{"id":2366,"date":"2019-10-08T10:11:17","date_gmt":"2019-10-08T08:11:17","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.nyje.al\/?p=2366"},"modified":"2024-09-04T12:44:41","modified_gmt":"2024-09-04T10:44:41","slug":"stereotipet-duhen-luftuar-jo-mbeshtetur","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/nyje.al\/sq\/stereotipet-duhen-luftuar-jo-mbeshtetur\/","title":{"rendered":"Stereotipet duhen luftuar, jo mb\u00ebshtetur"},"content":{"rendered":"
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Ronald Qema | 08.10.2019 | nyje.al<\/span>\u00a0<\/b><\/span><\/p>

\"Kam\u00ebz<\/a> Kam\u00ebz 2018<\/em><\/span><\/strong><\/span><\/p>

Kam d\u00ebgjuar se berberhanet e burrave nuk dallojn\u00eb shum\u00eb nga sallonet e bukuris\u00eb s\u00eb grave. Thelbi \u00ebsht\u00eb i nj\u00ebjt\u00eb, por \u2018maskuliniteti\u2019 i djemve dhe burrave nuk e pranon dot q\u00eb muhabetet mes tyre jan\u00eb nj\u00ebsoj me ato t\u00eb grave apo vajzave, madje p\u00ebrve\u00e7se seksiste, mes veti shpalosin edhe forma t\u00eb tjera diskriminimi q\u00eb me apo pavet\u00ebdije ua b\u00ebjn\u00eb \u201ct\u00eb tjer\u00ebve\u201d t\u00eb ndrysh\u00ebm nga vetja.<\/span><\/p>

Jam rritur pran\u00eb godinave blegtorale t\u00eb ish-ferm\u00ebs \u201cYlli i Kuq\u201d q\u00eb lul\u00ebzoi gjat\u00eb p\u00ebriudh\u00ebs moniste n\u00eb zon\u00ebn e Kamz\u00ebs s\u00eb sotme. Pas r\u00ebnies s\u00eb regjimit k\u00ebto nd\u00ebrtesa ashtu si\u00e7 \u00e7do godine tjet\u00ebr shtet\u00ebrore iu ndryshua funksioni dhe u mor n\u00ebn kontroll nga njer\u00ebzit. Me kalimin e koh\u00ebs gjat\u00eb viteve \u201890, masivizimi i migrimit t\u00eb popullsis\u00eb sa m\u00eb af\u00ebr kryeqytetit i populloi k\u00ebto nd\u00ebrtesa me banor\u00eb kryesisht t\u00eb ardhur nga Veriu i Shqip\u00ebris\u00eb. Kurr\u00eb nuk \u00ebsht\u00eb ditur se pse, por stigmatizimi i k\u00ebtyre banor\u00ebve p\u00ebr faktin q\u00eb jetonin n\u00eb ish-stallat e bag\u00ebtive ka nisur q\u00eb her\u00ebt, q\u00eb para se t\u00eb lindja un\u00eb. \u201cStallaxhinjt\u00eb\u201d \u00ebsht\u00eb termi m\u00eb diskriminues q\u00eb kam d\u00ebgjuar q\u00eb her\u00ebt n\u00eb f\u00ebmij\u00ebri, por q\u00eb von\u00eb e kam kuptuar sesa vler\u00eb ka pasur n\u00eb rritjen e qindra apo mij\u00ebra f\u00ebmij\u00ebve n\u00eb zon\u00ebn e\u00a0 Bathores dhe Kamz\u00ebs. Njiheshin si njer\u00ebz q\u00eb nuk dinin t\u00eb komunikonin, t\u00eb dhunsh\u00ebm dhe t\u00eb friksh\u00ebm p\u00ebr ata q\u00eb nuk ishin pjes\u00eb e atij komuniteti. Un\u00eb jam rritur n\u00eb nj\u00eb komunitet q\u00eb ka diskriminuar nj\u00eb komunitet m\u00eb t\u00eb vog\u00ebl, duke paragjykuar nga jasht\u00eb dhe duke mos ditur \u00e7far\u00eb ndodh aty brenda. Kush\u00ebrinjt\u00eb e mi kan\u00eb jetuar dhe vazhdojn\u00eb t\u00eb jetojn\u00eb n\u00eb ato godina dhe un\u00eb kam pasur shansin q\u00eb shpesh t\u00eb rrija me ta dhe t\u00eb kuptoja ‘bot\u00ebn’ e tyre.<\/span>
E kur them bot\u00ebn e tyre, flas p\u00ebr sht\u00ebpit\u00eb e vogla q\u00eb dimrin e vuanin dhe ver\u00ebn e g\u00ebzonin. Me paraditet bosh, se m\u00ebngjesi niste her\u00ebt: me n\u00ebnat q\u00eb p\u00ebrgatisnin at\u00eb pak ushqim e niseshin p\u00ebr n\u00eb pun\u00eb, burrat po ashtu, e me f\u00ebmij\u00ebt q\u00eb n\u00eb munges\u00eb t\u00eb kujdesit t\u00eb prindit niseshin si niseshin p\u00ebr n\u00eb shkoll\u00eb. Shpesh her\u00eb pa energji elektrike, t\u00eb pakt\u00eb ishin ata f\u00ebmij\u00eb q\u00eb arrinin t\u00eb p\u00ebrfundonin detyrat e shkoll\u00ebs pasi dielli n\u00eb at\u00eb hap\u00ebsir\u00eb t\u00eb vog\u00ebl, n\u00eb cepa t\u00eb ndrysh\u00ebm, ndri\u00e7onte ndryshe. Por p\u00ebrve\u00e7 rrethanave t\u00eb tjera, ajo q\u00eb mungonte m\u00eb shum\u00eb ishte komunikimi familjar. Puna e prind\u00ebrve me orare t\u00eb gjata, shkolla e f\u00ebmij\u00ebve, jeta e vak\u00ebt sociale, lodhja e madhe nga dit\u00eb t\u00eb tilla t\u00eb gjitha k\u00ebto kan\u00eb penguar mir\u00ebfunksionimin e institucionit t\u00eb familjes. Problemet sociale kan\u00eb qen\u00eb t\u00eb pranishme n\u00eb k\u00ebt\u00eb zon\u00eb pasi asnj\u00ebher\u00eb nuk u mundua kush t\u00eb nd\u00ebrhynte p\u00ebr t\u00eb siguruar nj\u00eb progres social me k\u00ebto familje q\u00eb e kishin nisur nga zero.
<\/span>E dini pse konsideroheshin t\u00eb dhunsh\u00ebm dhe barbar\u00eb?<\/span><\/p>

N\u00eb vitet\u00a0 \u201896-\u201897 u p\u00ebrfol se nj\u00eb plan gjoja urbanistik do t\u00eb prekte zon\u00ebn dhe si pasoj\u00eb k\u00ebrkohej lirimi i k\u00ebtyre nd\u00ebrtesave tashm\u00eb t\u00eb shnd\u00ebrruara me mund n\u00eb banesa me q\u00ebllimin p\u00ebr t\u2019i shkat\u00ebrruar. Banor\u00ebt asesi nuk ran\u00eb\u00a0 dakord, por luftuan kundrejt forcave policore q\u00eb donin t’i flaknin n\u00eb mes t\u00eb kat\u00ebr rrug\u00ebve, duke e cil\u00ebsuar k\u00ebt\u00eb dhe si spastrim mbi baz\u00ebn e prejardhjes. \u201cVerior\u00ebt n\u00eb veri t\u00eb Tiran\u00ebs jan\u00eb \u2018rrezik\u2019 p\u00ebr kryeqytetin prandaj duan t\u00eb na p\u00ebrz\u00ebn\u00eb\u201d – k\u00ebshtu mendonin banor\u00ebt at\u00eb koh\u00eb. Bllokuan rrug\u00ebn, duke djegur goma dhe kazan\u00ebt e plehrave dhe nuk lejuan prishjen e godinave duke mundur k\u00ebshtu politik\u00ebn e \u2018spastrimit\u2019 t\u00eb tyre.<\/span>
F\u00ebmij\u00ebt e k\u00ebtyre prind\u00ebrve q\u00eb luftuan p\u00ebr banesat e tyre u rrit\u00ebn gjithmon\u00eb me nevoj\u00ebn p\u00ebr t\u00eb qen\u00eb t\u00eb fort\u00eb q\u00eb t\u00eb mbijetonin. Mbaj mend q\u00eb kur luanin futboll me f\u00ebmij\u00ebt e lagjeve t\u00eb tjera dhe p\u00ebr shkak t\u00eb talenteve q\u00eb kishin n\u00eb skuad\u00ebr, mundnin \u00e7do kund\u00ebrshtar. N\u00eb fund t\u00eb ndeshjeve ngaq\u00eb nuk mateshin dot me ta nga ana sportive, kund\u00ebrshtar\u00ebt i ofendonin me fraz\u00ebn q\u00eb mezi prisnin t’ua thonin, \u201cYtt stallaxhinj\u00eb\u201d. Kaq mjaftonte q\u00eb sherri t\u00eb niste sepse ndon\u00ebse t\u00eb mirat materiale mund t\u2019u mungonin, dinjiteti nuk u mungonte aspak.<\/span>
T\u00eb gjykuar gjithmon\u00eb nga t\u00eb tjer\u00ebt jan\u00eb p\u00ebrjekur t\u00eb mbijetojn\u00eb dhe ja kan\u00eb dalur. Djemt\u00eb e asaj lagjjeje me krenari sot punojn\u00eb p\u00ebr t\u00eb siguruar t\u00eb ardhura p\u00ebr familjet e tyre, ndryshe nga shum\u00eb t\u00eb tjer\u00eb q\u00eb n\u00eb f\u00ebmij\u00ebri i diskriminonin.<\/span><\/p>

Riktheva k\u00ebto kujtime sepse, edhe pse tashm\u00eb berberi p\u00ebrve\u00e7 flok\u00ebve duhet t\u00eb merret dhe me mjekr\u00ebn time, kur d\u00ebgjova sot teksa prisja rradh\u00ebn nj\u00ebrin klient t’i thoshte berberit: \u201cH\u00eb mo ke pas noj \u00e7ik pun\u00eb, kan\u00eb ardhur stallaxhinjt\u00eb p\u00ebr t\u2019u qethur?\u201d-u riktheva n\u00eb f\u00ebmij\u00ebri dhe isha gati t\u2019i kthehesha si\u00e7 u ktheheshin dikur djemt\u00eb e asaj lagjeje.<\/span><\/p>\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Ronald Qema | 08.10.2019 | nyje.al\u00a0 Kam\u00ebz 2018 Kam d\u00ebgjuar se berberhanet e burrave nuk dallojn\u00eb shum\u00eb nga sallonet e bukuris\u00eb s\u00eb grave. Thelbi \u00ebsht\u00eb i nj\u00ebjt\u00eb, por \u2018maskuliniteti\u2019 i djemve dhe burrave nuk e pranon dot q\u00eb muhabetet mes tyre jan\u00eb nj\u00ebsoj me ato t\u00eb grave apo vajzave, madje p\u00ebrve\u00e7se seksiste, mes veti shpalosin edhe forma t\u00eb tjera diskriminimi q\u00eb me apo pavet\u00ebdije ua b\u00ebjn\u00eb \u201ct\u00eb tjer\u00ebve\u201d t\u00eb ndrysh\u00ebm nga vetja. Jam rritur pran\u00eb godinave blegtorale t\u00eb ish-ferm\u00ebs \u201cYlli i Kuq\u201d q\u00eb lul\u00ebzoi gjat\u00eb p\u00ebriudh\u00ebs moniste n\u00eb zon\u00ebn e Kamz\u00ebs s\u00eb sotme. Pas r\u00ebnies s\u00eb regjimit k\u00ebto nd\u00ebrtesa ashtu si\u00e7 \u00e7do godine tjet\u00ebr shtet\u00ebrore iu ndryshua funksioni dhe u mor n\u00ebn kontroll nga njer\u00ebzit. Me kalimin e koh\u00ebs gjat\u00eb viteve \u201890, masivizimi i migrimit t\u00eb popullsis\u00eb sa m\u00eb af\u00ebr kryeqytetit i populloi k\u00ebto nd\u00ebrtesa me banor\u00eb kryesisht t\u00eb ardhur nga Veriu i Shqip\u00ebris\u00eb. Kurr\u00eb nuk \u00ebsht\u00eb ditur se pse, por stigmatizimi i k\u00ebtyre banor\u00ebve p\u00ebr faktin q\u00eb jetonin n\u00eb ish-stallat e bag\u00ebtive ka nisur q\u00eb her\u00ebt, q\u00eb para se t\u00eb lindja un\u00eb. \u201cStallaxhinjt\u00eb\u201d \u00ebsht\u00eb termi m\u00eb diskriminues q\u00eb kam d\u00ebgjuar q\u00eb her\u00ebt n\u00eb f\u00ebmij\u00ebri, por q\u00eb von\u00eb e kam kuptuar sesa vler\u00eb ka pasur n\u00eb rritjen e qindra apo mij\u00ebra f\u00ebmij\u00ebve n\u00eb zon\u00ebn e\u00a0 Bathores dhe Kamz\u00ebs. Njiheshin si njer\u00ebz q\u00eb nuk dinin t\u00eb komunikonin, t\u00eb dhunsh\u00ebm dhe t\u00eb friksh\u00ebm p\u00ebr ata q\u00eb nuk ishin pjes\u00eb e atij komuniteti. Un\u00eb jam rritur n\u00eb nj\u00eb komunitet q\u00eb ka diskriminuar nj\u00eb komunitet m\u00eb t\u00eb vog\u00ebl, duke paragjykuar nga jasht\u00eb dhe duke mos ditur \u00e7far\u00eb ndodh aty brenda. Kush\u00ebrinjt\u00eb e mi kan\u00eb jetuar dhe vazhdojn\u00eb t\u00eb jetojn\u00eb n\u00eb ato godina dhe un\u00eb kam pasur shansin q\u00eb shpesh t\u00eb rrija me ta dhe t\u00eb kuptoja ‘bot\u00ebn’ e tyre.E kur them bot\u00ebn e tyre, flas p\u00ebr sht\u00ebpit\u00eb e vogla q\u00eb dimrin e vuanin dhe ver\u00ebn e g\u00ebzonin. Me paraditet bosh, se m\u00ebngjesi niste her\u00ebt: me n\u00ebnat q\u00eb p\u00ebrgatisnin at\u00eb pak ushqim e niseshin p\u00ebr n\u00eb pun\u00eb, burrat po ashtu, e me f\u00ebmij\u00ebt q\u00eb n\u00eb munges\u00eb t\u00eb kujdesit t\u00eb prindit niseshin si niseshin p\u00ebr n\u00eb shkoll\u00eb. Shpesh her\u00eb pa energji elektrike, t\u00eb pakt\u00eb ishin ata f\u00ebmij\u00eb q\u00eb arrinin t\u00eb p\u00ebrfundonin detyrat e shkoll\u00ebs pasi dielli n\u00eb at\u00eb hap\u00ebsir\u00eb t\u00eb vog\u00ebl, n\u00eb cepa t\u00eb ndrysh\u00ebm, ndri\u00e7onte ndryshe. Por p\u00ebrve\u00e7 rrethanave t\u00eb tjera, ajo q\u00eb mungonte m\u00eb shum\u00eb ishte komunikimi familjar. Puna e prind\u00ebrve me orare t\u00eb gjata, shkolla e f\u00ebmij\u00ebve, jeta e vak\u00ebt sociale, lodhja e madhe nga dit\u00eb t\u00eb tilla t\u00eb gjitha k\u00ebto kan\u00eb penguar mir\u00ebfunksionimin e institucionit t\u00eb familjes. Problemet sociale kan\u00eb qen\u00eb t\u00eb pranishme n\u00eb k\u00ebt\u00eb zon\u00eb pasi asnj\u00ebher\u00eb nuk u mundua kush t\u00eb nd\u00ebrhynte p\u00ebr t\u00eb siguruar nj\u00eb progres social me k\u00ebto familje q\u00eb e kishin nisur nga zero.E dini pse konsideroheshin t\u00eb dhunsh\u00ebm dhe barbar\u00eb? N\u00eb vitet\u00a0 \u201896-\u201897 u p\u00ebrfol se nj\u00eb plan gjoja urbanistik do t\u00eb prekte zon\u00ebn dhe si pasoj\u00eb k\u00ebrkohej lirimi i k\u00ebtyre nd\u00ebrtesave tashm\u00eb t\u00eb shnd\u00ebrruara me mund n\u00eb banesa me q\u00ebllimin p\u00ebr t\u2019i shkat\u00ebrruar. Banor\u00ebt asesi nuk ran\u00eb\u00a0 dakord, por luftuan kundrejt forcave policore q\u00eb donin t’i flaknin n\u00eb mes t\u00eb kat\u00ebr rrug\u00ebve, duke e cil\u00ebsuar k\u00ebt\u00eb dhe si spastrim mbi baz\u00ebn e prejardhjes. \u201cVerior\u00ebt n\u00eb veri t\u00eb Tiran\u00ebs jan\u00eb \u2018rrezik\u2019 p\u00ebr kryeqytetin prandaj duan t\u00eb na p\u00ebrz\u00ebn\u00eb\u201d – k\u00ebshtu mendonin banor\u00ebt at\u00eb koh\u00eb. Bllokuan rrug\u00ebn, duke djegur goma dhe kazan\u00ebt e plehrave dhe nuk lejuan prishjen e godinave duke mundur k\u00ebshtu politik\u00ebn e \u2018spastrimit\u2019 t\u00eb tyre.F\u00ebmij\u00ebt e k\u00ebtyre prind\u00ebrve q\u00eb luftuan p\u00ebr banesat e tyre u rrit\u00ebn gjithmon\u00eb me nevoj\u00ebn p\u00ebr t\u00eb qen\u00eb t\u00eb fort\u00eb q\u00eb t\u00eb mbijetonin. Mbaj mend q\u00eb kur luanin futboll me f\u00ebmij\u00ebt e lagjeve t\u00eb tjera dhe p\u00ebr shkak t\u00eb talenteve q\u00eb kishin n\u00eb skuad\u00ebr, mundnin \u00e7do kund\u00ebrshtar. N\u00eb fund t\u00eb ndeshjeve ngaq\u00eb nuk mateshin dot me ta nga ana sportive, kund\u00ebrshtar\u00ebt i ofendonin me fraz\u00ebn q\u00eb mezi prisnin t’ua thonin, \u201cYtt stallaxhinj\u00eb\u201d. Kaq mjaftonte q\u00eb sherri t\u00eb niste sepse ndon\u00ebse t\u00eb mirat materiale mund t\u2019u mungonin, dinjiteti nuk u mungonte aspak.T\u00eb gjykuar gjithmon\u00eb nga t\u00eb tjer\u00ebt jan\u00eb p\u00ebrjekur t\u00eb mbijetojn\u00eb dhe ja kan\u00eb dalur. Djemt\u00eb e asaj lagjjeje me krenari sot punojn\u00eb p\u00ebr t\u00eb siguruar t\u00eb ardhura p\u00ebr familjet e tyre, ndryshe nga shum\u00eb t\u00eb tjer\u00eb q\u00eb n\u00eb f\u00ebmij\u00ebri i diskriminonin. Riktheva k\u00ebto kujtime sepse, edhe pse tashm\u00eb berberi p\u00ebrve\u00e7 flok\u00ebve duhet t\u00eb merret dhe me mjekr\u00ebn time, kur d\u00ebgjova sot teksa prisja rradh\u00ebn nj\u00ebrin klient t’i thoshte berberit: \u201cH\u00eb mo ke pas noj \u00e7ik pun\u00eb, kan\u00eb ardhur stallaxhinjt\u00eb p\u00ebr t\u2019u qethur?\u201d-u riktheva n\u00eb f\u00ebmij\u00ebri dhe isha gati t\u2019i kthehesha si\u00e7 u ktheheshin dikur djemt\u00eb e asaj 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